“They Need to Go Tomorrow.” The Layoff Conversation I Refused to Have That Way.

A restructuring may be a business decision. But how you treat people when they leave is a leadership decision.

A restructuring may be a business decision. But how you treat people when they leave is a leadership decision.

I have been part of many difficult conversations during my career in HR.

There is one I still remember very clearly.

The Group had decided to reorganize the company.

The decision had been made without consulting the local team. Then, one day, they came with a list.

Names.

People.

“They need to go. Tomorrow.”

That was essentially the plan.

I understood the business decision.

What I couldn’t accept was the way we were about to execute it.

Because I didn’t see a list.

I saw people I knew.

People who had spent eight, nine, ten years building the company.

People who had worked through difficult periods, stayed late, solved problems, delivered when the business needed them and grown together with the organization.

And suddenly, years of work and commitment had become a line in a spreadsheet.

I remember thinking: we cannot do this like this.

I Wasn’t Arguing Against the Business

This distinction matters.

Companies sometimes need to restructure.

Roles disappear. Costs need to change. Strategies change. Organizations need to adapt.

I have worked in business long enough to understand that.

A company is not a nonprofit organization, and HR cannot pretend that difficult business decisions don’t exist.

So my conversation with the Group wasn’t:

“You can’t do this.”

It was:

“We can’t do it this way.”

And that conversation lasted for hours.

I explained the professional side first.

We had employment legislation to respect. We had processes to follow. We had responsibilities as an employer.

But there was another part of the conversation that mattered just as much to me.

The human one.

There Are People Behind the Names

I remember telling them something very simple.

These people helped build this company.

Some of them have given us almost ten years of their lives.

They have families.

Mortgages.

Plans.

Colleagues who have become friends.

A professional identity that, in many cases, has been connected to this company for a decade.

We may have a legitimate business reason to eliminate a role.

But our business decision is about to enter someone’s home.

That deserves more than a name on a list.

And there was something else I strongly believed then — and still believe today.

People can understand difficult decisions.

They may not like them.

They may be angry, disappointed or hurt.

But people are capable of understanding that businesses change.

The question is whether we give them enough respect to explain what is happening, why it is happening and what happens next.

Then Something Changed

To their credit, the Group listened.

And eventually they told me what was behind the urgency.

There was fear.

Fear of getting the Romanian process wrong.

Fear of the local legislation.

Fear of how people might react.

Fear of a context they didn’t fully understand.

And they acknowledged something important:

They had moved too quickly.

So we changed the approach.

Completely.

We followed the proper process.

But I wanted us to do more than follow the law.

I wanted us to do it right for the people too.

We spoke to them.

We explained what was happening and why.

We answered questions.

We gave them time.

There was financial support.

They had an additional period to look for another job.

We provided recommendations.

We helped connect people with other companies and potential opportunities.

And perhaps most importantly, we didn’t disappear after delivering the message.

We stayed and had the conversations.

Some were long.

Some were difficult.

Some were emotional.

That was part of our responsibility too.

The business decision hadn’t changed. But the way we chose to execute it had.

Same decision. Very different human experience.

Understanding Doesn’t Mean It Doesn’t Hurt

This is something I think businesses sometimes underestimate.

You can understand a decision intellectually and still be deeply hurt by it.

After ten years, you don’t simply pack your things and think:

“Fair enough. It’s business.”

Ten years is a significant part of someone’s life.

There are friendships.

Memories.

Successes.

Failures.

Late nights.

Difficult moments.

Projects you are proud of.

Maybe even a large part of your identity.

No severance package makes all of that disappear.

But there is an enormous difference between leaving an organization feeling discarded and leaving knowing that, even at the end, you were treated with dignity.

The people eventually understood what was happening.

They accepted the decision.

Not because it suddenly stopped hurting.

Because they understood it.

And because we gave them time, support and a way to move forward.

The People Who Stay Are Watching Too

There is another lesson from that experience that has stayed with me.

During a restructuring, we naturally focus on the people who are leaving.

But there is another audience in the room.

The people who stay.

They are watching.

They see how you treat a colleague who has given the company eight, nine or ten years.

They see whether your values still exist when keeping them becomes uncomfortable.

They see whether leaders show up for difficult conversations or hide behind HR.

And somewhere in their minds, there is a very simple question:

“If one day it’s me, is this how I will be treated?”

That is why the way a company handles a restructuring doesn’t only affect the people leaving.

It changes the relationship with the people who remain.

Five Questions I Would Ask Today

That experience stayed with me throughout my career.

Today, before executing a difficult people decision, I would want five questions answered.

1. BUSINESS — Is the Decision Necessary?

Can we explain honestly why we are doing it?

A difficult decision can still be the right business decision.

But leaders should be able to explain the business rationale clearly, without hiding behind vague corporate language.

2. LEGAL — Are We Doing It Correctly?

Have we respected the law, the process and our responsibilities as an employer?

Compliance is not optional.

But I also don’t believe compliance should be the finish line.

“It’s legal” and “we handled it well” are not the same thing.

3. CLEAR — Will People Understand What Is Happening?

Have we explained why this is happening?

What happens next?

Who can answer their questions?

People should not have to reconstruct the story from rumours, corridors and WhatsApp messages.

Uncertainty creates its own damage.

4. HUMAN — What Can We Realistically Do to Help?

Time.

Financial support where possible.

Recommendations.

Career support.

Introductions to other companies.

Simply being available for another conversation.

You cannot remove the impact of losing a job.

But you can decide whether someone faces the next chapter completely alone.

5. DIGNIFIED — Would I Be Comfortable Being Treated This Way Myself?

For me, this may be the simplest test of all.

If my name were on that list, would I consider this process respectful?

If it were my partner?

My friend?

Someone who had given ten years to my company?

Would I still believe we had handled it well?

BUSINESS → LEGAL → CLEAR → HUMAN → DIGNIFIED

The final business decision may remain exactly the same.

The experience of the people affected by it can be completely different.

I Still Remember the People, Not the Spreadsheet

Years later, I don’t remember every number behind that restructuring.

I don’t remember every line in the business case.

I remember the conversations.

I remember the people who were leaving.

I remember how difficult it was for some of them to accept that something they had helped build would continue without them.

And I remember how close we came to handling that moment very differently.

That experience reinforced something I have believed throughout my career.

HR’s role isn’t to prevent every difficult business decision.

Sometimes our job is to help the organization execute those decisions.

But correctly.

Legally, of course.

And also with clarity.

With time.

With respect.

With responsibility.

With humanity.

Because behind every name on a restructuring spreadsheet is a person whose life is about to change.

A layoff may start as a business decision.

How you let someone go is a leadership decision.